Life's like that

Out cleavage, come collarbones. You’ve been seeing a lot of them off-shoulders, tube tops, V-neck sweaters and spaghetti straps lately… Never mind it’s rainy season. This landmark just below the sexiest part of the woman’s body (the neck) takes center stage now. A lot of men like seeing the woman’s collarbones because it is one of her “vulnerable” portions. Other “vulnerable” features include neck, shoulders, wrists and ankles. The contemporary majority actually like it better when these features belong to the skinny woman. Voluptuous may still be sexy for some, but hey, it’s the age of anorexia.

Out eight-hour stress, come part-time/freelance. The yuppies just got more versatile. Latest surveys from all over Asia say that fresh grads---and err, fresh job-seekers--- prefer having one or two part time jobs or do freelance than be stuck in the office for eight hours straight. They say they want their day to become less tedious, have a more diverse network and make their schedule more dynamic. Clever isn’t it? One can have brunch dates, lunch dates and mid-afternoon munch dates.

Out monthly salon trips, come home hair treatments. In a world where everybody is in a hurry(this world is called college), the average human being who usually had monthly hot oil/hair spa at her trusted salon would actually opt for home treatments. It is easier, cheaper, faster and there’s no need to dress up. (You can even do it naked.) You just have to apply the cream in her hair evenly, massage your scalp for awhile, wrap it up in a shower cap, wait for 20-30 minutes and rinse with water. Even foot spa and hair relaxing can be done at home. Sweet home.

Out Sheldon, come fast-food fiction. Cosmopolitan books, chick lit and Youngblood have skyscraper sales during the past three years. Blogospheres have more participants. Thing is, people nowadays may still want to be entertained by reading, but you know, their business (read as busy-ness) forces them to read quicker stories. Albeit Literature remaining sweet, it just keeps getting shorter.

Out Atkins, come Three-hour diet. The Chair of Harvard's nutrition department went on record before a 1973 U.S. Senate Select Committee investigating fad diets: "The Atkins Diet is nonsense... Any book that recommends unlimited amounts of meat, butter, and eggs, as this one does, in my opinion is dangerous. The author who makes the suggestion is guilty of malpractice." The Atkins diet is also known as the nightmare diet---especially to the rice-loving Filipino. You’ll likely be facing a self-inflicted psy-war before you get to your dining table. The Three-hour diet on the other hand, makes you lose weight by following time intervals. Just eat one hour after you wake up, then have a light snack after three hours. Have lunch after three hours, have another light snack after three hours then dinner after another three hours. Eat nothing after dinner. Drink water whenever you want to eat, when you’re not supposed to eat---especially during the after-dinner time. Voila! You’ll lose inches after a week. That’s the 3Hour diet. Easy, quick and cool. Most importantly, you can still eat WHATEVER you want.

Darwin was right. There had been evolution. Coz there still is.

how weird is weird

Here is the list of top 10 weirdest things about me, and err, of course, why YOU love me so much. *wink*

1. I love the smell of paper. I smell receipts, quiz papers, newspapers, flyers, even cartolina! I dunno why, i really really love the smell of papers. My friends' eyes roll everytime i sniff every kind of paper that passes my hands. I especially love the smell of old books, newspaper and newly photocopied paper.

2. I cry easily because of a song, or a poem, or a TV commercial. But it's hard to cry in real life. Like, you know, if my current squeeze and I are on a fight or if my mom scolds me. Top tearjerkers: That's Why You Go by Michael Learns to Rock, Neruda poetry and some McDo commercials.

3. I read books halfway, then I forget about them, then read another book, then after a while I remember that I have a "unfinished" book so I go back to reading it again, albeit dizzy trying to recall the plot. Sometimes, I just read the whole book AGAIN.

4. I eat at least four cups of rice a day to maintain my weight. If I eat less than that for one straight week, I'd become Nicole Richie. My metabolism is so promiscuous.

5. I can't write straight news. I just can't. I've been writing feature essays since high school and lots and lots of poetry. Plus I have no plans of practicing. How the hell can I write straight news?! One time, I did a creative twist on my business paper, I was "scolded" in class. Tsk tsk.

6. My first dream was to become an astronaut. Or an astronomer. When I still didn't care whether I wore a panty or not, I'd coerce my parents to buy me books about space and heavenly bodies. My ninong---my lovable ninong---whom I haven't heard from for more than ten years thought that I still want to be an astronomer and last year he gave me a huge astronomical telescope. Won.der.ful!

7. I love tearing the skin off the sides of my fingers. It's a habit. An old habit. You know what they say about old habits. *sigh* Sometimes, they bleed. Which brings me to my next weirdness.

8. I love the taste of blood. I have my own share of blood everyday. I get it via my tooth. Hehehe. It's true, I love the taste of it. It has this fruity-salty taste and playful-salty smell which tickles a part of me.

9. I can be addicted to peppermint tea. I had been addicted to this. And I can go back to being addicted with it again. Especially now that I've found out that drinking peppermint tea will make your *bodily* juice smell like mint. *wink*

10. I'm in love with indie music. I dunno if this is really weird. I know we have preferences and this is simply mine. Mine. All mine. I'm falling for Meg and Dia and Feist.

Nice to know

WARNING: Things about to be read in this entry is made from the cluttered mind. Or the wandering mind. Or the lack of mind. Ah basta! The one who made these didn’t mind. They may not be suitable for people who actually read. Parental guidance is advised.

***

It’s fascinating to know that you know what people think they know without them knowing that you know that they don’t know what they think you don’t know.

And the preceding paragraph spells exactly the reason why I am smiling like a drunken hyena right now.

Gestalt psychology talks about people perceiving things as whole units. That when we see a “square” with broken lines, we would instinctively fill in the broken parts for it to become a square. It is also the reason why dancers SHOULD have a costume, why when we look at corridors we see the people passing by as people-passing-by and not as different individuals off to different ways. Maybe it’s because looking at people is easier if you look at them as one group. I mean, we only have two eyes, duh. Oh-kay. Enough of the char. It’s just like gossip. When somebody hears something so juicy but quite incomplete, s/he would fill it in and draw conclusions from it. Then voila! You got a whole pitcher of brand-spanking-new slander. It’s WHOLE now. Of course, they wouldn’t want an incomplete thing to gossip about. They wouldn’t want to appear in-credible! Amusing. They should win Palanca. *grunts*

Anyway. I am currently in the stage of falling in love with my course(BA Mktg). Before, I used to hammer myself with thoughts about shifting, or about graduating as soon as possible and work, or about just quitting school and work full time on my previous employer. I especially needed lots and lots of vodka when I took my first look on my print out. I will have 6 units of Financial Management. The risk-return-stock-price-fluctuation thingy. Grr. It even involves formulas which I think were made before there was the Ten Commandments. Andami! My gosh!

And one more thing, I really can’t get along with the calculator. Everytime I face it (especially for Finance), love isn’t an option. I can’t think of any positive word, my brain cells just rally and I feel like stabbing myself with a brass protractor.

But now, I’m learning to love it, you know, embracing my calculator to sleep…participating in the two-hour-thrice-a-week class…stroking my scalp with the fact that this hell is only gonna be for five months. (Yes, honey, I’m not failing again. I’ve slapped myself a million times. Some people also helped in the slapping. Haha.)

Syangapala, I have this immediate need to gain mass and have longer hair. So help me Goddess.

Ice cream ta diha!

SORBETES

Sa iyo na ang aking puso

Na naninigas sa bawat

Dalisay mong ngiti

Minsan animo’y sorbetes pa

Na natutunaw sa rurok

Ng mapusok na tanghali

Sorbetes na

Nakahandusay sa daan

Tulad ng tamis

Na iniaalay ko sa’yo

At sa bawat paglingon mo

Hindi mo batid

Na ako’y lalong nanghihina

Pagka’t ako’y nagpapakaalipin

Sa ‘di mapigilang init

At nakikisuyo sa hangin

Na sana’y mapansin

Animo’y sorbetes sa kalsada

Na sadyang binuhos

At iniwanan

Ng salabaheng bata

Naisin ko mang mapagbigyang

Mapalapit sa iyo ng matagal

Mahirap iwasang matunaw muli

Kaya ang pag-ibig mo’y

Wari pangarap na lamang

Animo’y kurtinang sorbetes

Mula sa mga labing---

iyong mga labing---

matagal ko nang

Gustong angkinin.

***

Hay i'm so loving this new freedom stilt in Ateneo campus! Gives my poetry a new area to flirt in public! Hahaha! I think James Chew(Samahan secgen) was the foremost one who made this stilt possible! Ailabyu James! Hahaha! Matagal ko na itong pinangarap! Di nasayang ang 48years at 48hands na ginamit ko para mangapanya for you! Hehehe! How useless, di rin ito mababasa ni James.

Anyway, the course requirements are killing me now. As in. I think the BA program has just changed the vission-mission into something that prevents me from producing another human being for-dog's-sake. Makabaog! I have lots of papers to finish which poke me when I'm about to do nothing. *pouts*

It bothers me rin pala that the Ateneo foodcourt has brandied mocha shake. It IS brandy. My first sip with it was like a truck forcing itself to make kasya in my ears.

And oh yes, oh yes, oh yes, I am in love. *curls toes*

Desperate Beehives

1. They post their number/s in friendster or their blog/s and even make it a chatroom shout out.
2. They join every club in school. Or in the city.
3. They never miss a party.
4. They like giving their number, and taking other people's numbers.
5. They like wine.
6. They actually pray for a boy/girl friend.
7. They stare at sweet lovers in public places. Then their eyes turn into jade.
8. They are usually bitter when it comes to talking about relationships...or overly idealistic.
9. They usually go out alone, and they dress up pretty extravagantly.
10. They ask their friends to find them a prospect.
11. Their friendster is like a crowded online zoo. And usually full of people of the opposite sex(or, in the case of homos, the same sex).


I'm getting pissed seeing a lot of them lately. Pero bahala sila. Hahaha.

***

I resigned. Nasagasaan kasi ng major ko ang aking office time. Ayun, i have no other choice but to quit the job. It sucks big time coz i need the money for my debate tourneys. Oh well. When bad things happen to good(?) people...

Do you believe in Destiny?

First, I’d like to say that a person does not necessarily need a SPECIAL SOMEONE to be complete. It is embarked on our minds that a person needs to end up with someone or end up marrying just to be happy. The truth is, NO. Happiness is a choice. It is something that we all should be aware of.

We are all complete on our own. We don’t need to become a portion of a pair. If we feel we need somebody to complete us, then it assumes we are incomplete. That in itself is a problem. Feeling inadequate.

I believe that one of the main reasons why everybody wants to end up with somebody is that everybody wants a home. You know, to have somewhere to always run to when everything is gone. A home which has the picture of a loving husband, a pretty little wife who can cook well and adorable kids. And sure, I’d still want a home. I’d still want kids. But I can do so without a husband. I can have sex without kids and kids without sex.

Where does love take its place now? A person is all well capable of loving, and loving another individual. I do not deny this, because I loved and I am in love. Sometimes it’s about having the right person at the right place and at the right time. Sometimes it’s about status. Sometimes it’s about connections. We don’t really know, but we’ve gotta make it happen. Love is a choice, but being in love is not. It just haunts you and follows you and intoxicates you. And you'll like it that way.

So, to answer the question, (hehehe nagsermon pa!) I do not believe in destiny. It’s just an excuse in letting things happen instead of MAKING them happen. Destiny is the usual “scapegoat” when we don’t fully understand what happens AT THE BEGINNING AND AT THE END. But in between, it is all up to us…and what's "in between" is what actually counts the most. :)

Two Interesting Testimonies

“I loved him. I sure did. I cared for him a lot. I didn’t like seeing him hurt. I was glad when he was, I supported him, I tried to become a helper in fulfilling his dreams. We’d talk till 2, laugh when we’re together and sure spent a lot of time together. I nurtured his talents. I encouraged him to become better. I liked seeing him better. It fills in a certain empty canister within me. It feels good. Almost motherly. But no, I wasn’t in love with him. I never wanted to kiss him. I never envisioned being his wife. I never, ever felt crazy, deranged, intoxicated. He was never in my dreams. So much more in my daydreams. I loved him. I tried so much not to hurt him. I loved him, I simply wasn’t IN LOVE with him…”

“I’m in love with him. Because I like what I see and I’m seeing a lot of them. My toes curl with every sweet word that he utters, my sighs are countless, my knees wobble. He lives a different life, and when he talks about the girls he meets, I get jealous easily. Really easily. And what’s dangerous? I get REALLY jealous. I’d be like, crazy, flying, buzzing..it feels like a roller coaster ride which I never wanted to end. When he kisses me my anatomy gets mixed up. My brain cells rally. My pheromones overflow. I loooove looking into his eyes. It’s like drowning into them. Problem? I DON’T LOVE HIM. It doesn’t go beyond the toffee cotton candy.”

Compliments to the voices in my head.

I’ve experienced being in love with a person but loving another. I’ve experienced loving a person and being in love with him too. Both had some level of easiness. And confusion.

****

Now playing: Angel (Duet) by Sarah Mclachlan and Josh Groban.

I personally like the simplicity of this song. Their voices blended well. I loved loved loved the part where they sang together. Sometimes Josh’s voice takes the driver’s seat, sometimes Sarah’s voice does it. It makes me THINK of dying at peace. Think lang. Think LANG.